There are many things that can seemingly be accomplished with enough sacrifice and hard work. But when you achieve something through sacrifice, you’re merely trading one resource for another. It’s about as much of an accomplish as buying a loaf a bread.

On the other hand, when you achieve an empowering new perspective, you multiply the value of everything around you. Each thought carries you closer and closer to previously imperceptible solutions. It’s like inventing sliced bread and instantly seeing a few applications for it, which soon lead dozens—and then hundreds—more as your singular idea gives birth to a myriad of million dollar industries.

Sometimes trade-offs are the path of least resistance—you don’t always have to reinvent the wheel. But when it comes to your life’s work, wouldn’t it be nice to elevate your perspective to a point where the wheels are already spinning in your favor?

It might be a lot easier to get to where you want to be by first finding a vehicle capable of taking you there. And who knows, once you’ve upgraded your means of travel, you may decide on a whole new destination. One that couldn’t be seen when you were merely choosing from the options that seemed achievable, but becomes abundantly obvious when viewed through the lens of what’s dream-able.

Besides, is there any truer achievement than living the life of your dreams? And when you think of the life of your dreams, what role do trade-offs play in it?

If the life of your dreams doesn’t involve making trade-offs, then how much sense does it make to get in the habit of making them now?

When dealing with others, rather than focusing on how they see things, or even how you would like them to see things, what if you focused instead on seeing yourself as someone who can see them as seeing that all as well? This way, the focal point is completely on you, and your ability to shift your perspective so that you can see things in ways that feel better to you. Then you don’t have to convince yourself that they’re going to improve, you need only remember that you have the ability to improve the way you see them.

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The balance between fully being yourself and dealing with how others may judge you. And how understanding the reasons others may see things the way they do can help you see them in a better light and feel better about the situation as a whole.

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How hiding certain aspects of yourself can prevent you from manifesting change in those areas in of your life. Because once something has manifested, it can be seen by all; and if you don’t want this part of you to be seen, your desire to hide will contradict your desire to manifest change.

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How the energy of a group can affect you. And finding a balance between hard work and being in the flow.

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What effect do the beliefs that are passed down from our parents have on us? Are they a hindrance to our growth or do they serve us?

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In this segment Sheri and I discuss how society tends to discourage people from being proud of themselves / happy for themselves by saying that openly broadcasting your awesomeness means that you’re being vane; and how we might feel better about ourselves by allowing ourselves to brag a little more.

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In this first part of the pilot episode, Sheri and I discuss the power of using “you” vs using “I” when relating personal stories. There’s no introductions or explanations, it’s just a tiny slice of life that you may find thought provoking.

Part 2 of the conversation segues into how feeling pressure from society to not brag and deflect credit can negatively impact our self-esteem.

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What’s so sad about most abuse cases we hear about these days is how we cling to the notion that there’s something wrong with them, rather than celebrating the abnormal use of each precious moment we spend on Earth.

It takes a mind that’s willing to see things in ways different from how they’re being presented to invent something new. And that same ingenuity is required to love something others are clamoring to condemn.

There’s so much give-and-take to the average conversation that it may seem impossible to regularly communicate with anyone this way, but I’d like to share an example of how to achieve just that.

Because of how naturally we follow dialogue, the example I’ve shared below is a surprisingly easy read. At nearly 5,000 words long (I meant it when I said DEEP conversation) it not only showcases the real-time shifts in perspective that complete-thought conversation can accomplish, but it touches on universal themes such as dealing with feelings of inadequacy, learning to love more unconditionally, and finding joy through focusing on the essence of your desire rather than clinging to the specifics.

It took place over Skype‘s free instant messenger feature, which works especially well for complete-thought conversations because it allows you to easily quote things that were shared earlier. This allowed us to touch on everything we wanted to discuss in detail. It’s almost as if two parallel conversations were occurring for a time; my conversation with her original message, and her conversation with my responses. It isn’t until toward the very end of our discussion that I finally started reading her responses because I had the freedom to focus solely on what I wanted to say, knowing I’d have ample time to read whatever else she had to say after I’d completed my thoughts, which creates an incredibly rich environment for self-discovery and mutual understanding.

This particular conversation sprang from my decision to share more of my thoughts with my girlfriend, especially the thoughts that I was holding back because I perceived they would not be well received. When I first began sharing these thoughts she responded with a lot of resistance. From her perspective it felt like she wasn’t being loved; and from my perspective I was sharing thoughts that may seem unloving because I wanted the opportunity to shift them into thoughts that are truly loving.

If you don’t share your unloving thoughts, those parts of you remain stagnant and you withhold vital growth opportunities from the relationship. By choosing to silence those parts of you, you’re silently condemning yourself to continuing to think that way. By sharing those thoughts, you’re giving yourself a chance to change. And not only change your own perspective, but help your significant other improve his or hers as well.

PS: I know 5,000 words may seem like a lot for a blog post, but if you’ve resonated with my earlier writings on relationships you will definitely find a ton of value below. It’s about the size of one book chapter and is probably one of the most comprehensive examples out there at how to use communication to deepen your relationships.

[5/29/2011 10:04:18 AM] Susanne:

[Editors note: Her first message begins with her paraphrasing some of things I've recently shared with her and responding with her feelings on them.]

Here are the “brutally honest” things that I am choosing to focus on that are causing me to feel such “pain”:

“I don’t know why I call you beautiful, I just like the way it sounds”. You know, I’d like to be with someone who DOES think I’m beautiful. Maybe at times I don’t feel beautiful. Maybe I am questioning my own beauty. I do know there are times when I do truly feel beautiful and I feel good when I think that way….and then I think of what you said, and don’t feel beautiful any more. It’s a constant struggle of thoughts…..back and forth, back and forth. If I could see the beauty within myself and KNOW it, this wouldn’t be an issue. I would just know, I am beautiful….end of story.

“I sometimes kiss you because I feel obligated”. Now every time we kiss, I wonder if you really want to or if you’re just doing it because you feel like you have to. It doesn’t feel good to know someone is just kissing you because they feel like they have to. Although, I guess I could see in that gesture, that you are caring about how I feel and want me to feel loved even if you are not feeling loving in that moment. Somethings still messed up about this…..I wish you’d just kiss me because you want to….because you love me and you feel good sharing physical affection with me. You know, if I’m being brutally honest with myself, there are times that I kiss you because I feel like I have to…..hmmmm…..and I still love you.

Another thought creeps up from the previous statement…..what if you don’t really love me and just do it because you feel like you have to….in order to keep the home, sex, and other fringe benefits coming? Wow, that doesn’t feel good for me to think about….and yet, I do. And when I do, I feel bad. Obviously, I get to choose my thoughts, so why do I choose thoughts that feel bad? Maybe because I’m thinking some of those same thoughts about you? Again, if I’m being brutally honest with myself, I sometimes wonder if I have you living here with me so that I don’t have to live completely alone. It is pleasant to have someone else around and not be here alone.

Then another thoughts creeps up from there. If I just have you here so I don’t have to be alone, what if I don’t really love YOU? It doesn’t feel good to me when I think about not really loving you, so I don’t think that’s it. Maybe I’m using you….and to some extent, I probably am. I feel bad when I think about “using” you. Why? Isn’t all our interaction with others about doing what feels good to us and getting what we want….helping us to create our own expansion? I have beliefs that “using” others is bad….and I can shift that.

I sat down to write out a nice, long list of all the things you’ve said that cause me to feel bad and yet, I am feeling complete and no longer have a need to share them because it is becoming more and more clear to me that this is more about me and my thoughts, than about you. Yes, you are the one who has said these things, but I am the one calling them into my experience. Why? Because these are the thoughts that I want to change. I don’t want to just try and think happier thoughts (i.e.- living in the land of make-believe), I want to actually BELIEVE them….because when I actually believe them, I don’t have to keep traveling to the land of make-believe. That trip is starting to feel like a lot of work.

…

Even though I have gotten a lot of clarity from this little exercise, it doesn’t feel like I’m completely there yet….but I’m on my way.

[5/29/2011 10:11:51 AM] Josh Billings:

“I don’t know why I call you beautiful, I just like the way it sounds”.

That’s not what I said at all. What I said was that I say it because it feels good to me, but my current understanding of “hot” is different from how I see you.

I don’t consider myself to be “hot” either. Does that mean that I should just fucking kill myself? Or is it possible that that’s not a parameter that’s very important to me?

You know, I’d like to be with someone who DOES think I’m beautiful.

Why? Why do you want this?

[5/29/2011 10:15:30 AM] Susanne:

Or is it possible that that’s not a parameter that’s very important to me?

Interesting. I had never thought of it that way. Thanks for sharing it.

Why? Why do you want this?

Because I want to believe that I’m beautiful.

And, yes, I realize that this is up to me and not someone else.

[5/29/2011 10:18:47 AM] Josh Billings:

I do know there are times when I do truly feel beautiful

And there are times when I call you beautiful and truly mean it. I just often think on an objective level, where my understanding of beauty has grown to be so crystallized. Compare the looks of characters in fairy tales and you’ll find that the “good” characters look distinctly different from the “evil” ones. The ugly step-mother and step-sisters from Cinderella come to mind, because writers and tellers of tales have learned that it’s easier to gain sympathy and support from readers / viewers if the current view of beauty is cast upon the protagonist and the view of ugliness upon the antagonist. So we’ve gradually learned to associate a narrow vision of “beauty” with all things good in the world, and any dilution of that beauty as a lesser form of good.

and then I think of what you said, and don’t feel beautiful any more.

Yeah, it’s amazing what focusing on what you don’t want will do. It will make the world seem as if it contains less and less of what you do want. But rather than questioning what you don’t want, you take it as you see it, without reaching for deeper clarity from me (or whatever is in question). Because you’ve taught yourself not to dig deeper because digging deeper leads to greater pain. You are afraid that you’re really not beautiful, and that if you ask me why I said that, or why I might believe it, that it would confirm that you are indeed not beautiful. Rather than that further exploration might lead to you remembering how Source-like you are. If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, than Source sees beauty in all. And you’re conditional view (or your focusing on my conditional view) of beauty is what’s cutting you off from your ability to feel that you are beautiful.

If I could see the beauty within myself and KNOW it, this wouldn’t be an issue. I would just know, I am beautiful….end of story.

yup.

[5/29/2011 10:24:46 AM] Susanne:

So we’ve gradually learned to associate a narrow vision of “beauty” with all things good in the world, and any dilution of that beauty as a lesser form of good.

Duly noted. I also know that my mom is VERY into her looks and being beautiful. I grew up with that and I sometimes find it hard to shake that way of thinking.

[5/29/2011 10:25:13 AM] Josh Billings:

Now every time we kiss, I wonder if you really want to or if you’re just doing it because you feel like you have to.

Which points out how much power you’ve given to other people’s words. Rather than deciding how you want to feel about being kissed, you have placed my words, which occurred in “reality,” above your desires which you’ve condemned as a fantasy. And now you’re forced to live out reality as is, because you’ve devalued your ability to create to such a degree that anything that is pre-manifestational is fantasy and thus not to be invested in. This stunts your ability to focus on something for long enough to actually bring it into reality.

It doesn’t feel good to know someone is just kissing you because they feel like they have to.

Can you really know this? I think this can be cleaned up with a few Byron Katie questions that will all point back to you having the power to believe what you want to believe and feel how you want to feel.

[5/29/2011 10:26:39 AM] Susanne:

rather than questioning what you don’t want, you take it as you see it, without reaching for deeper clarity from me (or whatever is in question). Because you’ve taught yourself not to dig deeper because digging deeper leads to greater pain. You are afraid that you’re really not beautiful, and that if you ask me why I said that, or why I might believe it, that it would confirm that you are indeed not beautiful. Rather than that further exploration might lead to you remembering how Source-like you are. If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, than Source sees beauty in all. And you’re conditional view (or your focusing on my conditional view) of beauty is what’s cutting you off from your ability to feel that you are beautiful.

Wow, this is big.

[5/29/2011 10:32:26 AM] Josh Billings:

Although, I guess I could see in that gesture, that you are caring about how I feel and want me to feel loved even if you are not feeling loving in that moment.

This is radically conditional thinking. “If he doesn’t want to kiss me, he doesn’t love me.” You’ve taken the broad, and infinitely expressible concept of love and narrowed it down to “If he doesn’t do what I want, he doesn’t love me.” You may not think that consciously, but you do tell yourself that what you really want is a very specific experience, and when really doesn’t conform to your very specific vision of how it should deliver your desires, you react in ways that don’t feel good to you because on an unconscious level you know that those not so good feelings will likely spread to me and cause me to alter my behavior and give you what you want. This was taught to you at a very young age when you realized that acting in certain ways pleased your parents and made love more available, why acting in other ways had the opposite effect. And you took this teaching and applied it to your interactions with other people because it’s the way your parents taught you to get what you want.

I wish you’d just kiss me because you want to

You’re expecting me to conform to your vision of how love is expressed. If you could see love in all its incarnations, you would never doubt my love for you again.

because you love me and you feel good sharing physical affection with me.

I’d only be sharing physical affection if that’s how I felt like expressing myself. When I used to not kiss you because I didn’t feel like it in that moment, you would react negatively, and I would feel worse from observing your reaction and deeming myself responsible for your dis-ease. And I associated my action of not kissing you with the negative feelings I felt in response to the negative affect I appeared to be having on you.

You know, if I’m being brutally honest with myself, there are times that I kiss you because I feel like I have to…..hmmmm…..and I still love you. Interesting.

This is one of the benefits of going deeper with thought. On the surface, things may seem like one thing, but when you take it one or two levels deeper you realize something different entirely.

Deeper thought can be a little more strenuous than surface thinking, because the very value it provides is to challenge the surface-level notions that we cast by default. This creates cognitive dissonance between what we’ve come to believe through observation and what we’re capable of understanding through introspection.

[5/29/2011 10:41:28 AM] Susanne:

And now you’re forced to live out reality as is, because you’ve devalued your ability to create to such a degree that anything that is pre-manifestational is fantasy and thus not to be invested in. This stunts your ability to focus on something for long enough to actually bring it into reality.

This feels off to me. The part “This stunts your ability to focus on something for long enough to actually bring it into reality” really doesn’t resonate with me. I think my perspective on the subject is at fault here.

This is radically conditional thinking. “If he doesn’t want to kiss me, he doesn’t love me.”

Yes, I think this way and your analysis is dead on. Now how do I keep from thinking this way when I’ve done it for so long?

[5/29/2011 10:47:46 AM] Josh Billings:

Another thought creeps up from the previous statement…..what if you don’t really love me and just do it because you feel like you have to….in order to keep the home, sex, and other fringe benefits coming?

This is entirely possible. I could try refuting it with volumes of evidence that support how I very rarely do anything unless I feel like it; and it’s pretty unlikely that I’ve spent the last several months waking up with insatiable urge to fake loving you. But I think there would be more value in you actually exploring this notion on your own. Perhaps I am doing this and even I don’t know it. Maybe I’m loving you the same way a crack addict loves crack, because the immediate benefits seem to outweigh his deeper desires to build the life he truly wants.

You could speculate endlessly as to whether or not this is the case, and question and test me to get to the bottom of things. Or you could simply attempt to figure out what is leading you to think this and/or create this, and then move to replace that chain of thought with thoughts that align with what you do desire. Then, once you’ve aligned your thoughts with what you do desire, if I’m a match for that I’ll stick around, and if not I’ll fade out of your life as your greater attention to what you do desire calls in someone who is a match for that.

5/29/2011 10:50:10 AM] Susanne:

If you could see love in all its incarnations, you would never doubt my love for you again.

Mmmmm, I feel good when I think of never doubting your love for me again. I want to be able to see love in all its forms, not just the ones that I have defined.

because the immediate benefits seem to outweigh his deeper desires to build the life he truly wants.

I actually believe that the immediate benefits you are receiving are helping you to create the life you truly want. You are not using one in place of getting the other, you are using one to help create the other (it’s inclusive).

Then, once you’ve aligned your thoughts with what you do desire, if I’m a match for that I’ll stick around, and if not I’ll fade out of your life as your greater attention to what you do desire calls in someone who is a match for that.

This scares me and the reason is because I think about you not being in my life….and that doesn’t feel good.

[5/29/2011 11:04:12 AM] Josh Billings:

Wow, that doesn’t feel good for me to think about….and yet, I do. And when I do, I feel bad. Obviously, I get to choose my thoughts, so why do I choose thoughts that feel bad? Maybe because I’m thinking some of those same thoughts about you? Again, if I’m being brutally honest with myself, I sometimes wonder if I have you living here with me so that I don’t have to live completely alone. It is pleasant to have someone else around and not be here alone.

The reason we attract unpleasant thoughts into our experience is because that discomfort will help clarify what we do want and spur us to create change. What if the reason you were attracting these thoughts was because you wanted to challenge the notion that it’s pleasant to not be alone? And maybe the only reason you think it’s so unpleasant to be alone is that you’re so dependent upon reality validating your thoughts (because anything unvalidated by reality is a “fantasy”) that you “need” people outside of you to express love to you so that you can observe your lovableness and believe in it. But then when you’re alone for long enough, and that love isn’t being expressed, you feel the absence of that love and (from that loveless perspective) begin to doubt the validity of that love in the first place.

So your habit of discrediting love that you can’t see creates a need to experience love that you can see. While you’re experiencing or remembering love that you can see, you feel great; but in the absence of love that you can see, you experience an absence of love. And from that absence of love you perceive an absence of love even in the love that you previously experienced.

If all that sounds convoluted it’s because it is. If you could simply honor the validity of your vision of life that you’ve taken to calling a “fantasy,” then that vision would become your predominate point of attraction and eventually manifest into reality.

[5/29/2011 11:10:11 AM] Susanne:

If you could see love in all its incarnations, you would never doubt my love for you again.

….and I would never doubt MY love for YOU again either…..and I feel really good when I think that way.

[5/29/2011 11:10:50 AM] Josh Billings:

Then another thoughts creeps up from there. If I just have you here so I don’t have to be alone, what if I don’t really love YOU?

Haha. Thinking about love when you’re not feeling the love is like thinking about anger when you’re not angry. If you’re not angry, then anger seems absurd. If you are angry, anger seems like the only appropriate response. Similarly, if you’re no where near the vibration of love, love seems absurd. “Why would I love you if you don’t love me?” “Why would I love you if I might get hurt?” And when you are vibrating from a place of pure love, anything that doesn’t feel as good as love seems absurd.

It doesn’t feel good to me when I think about not really loving you, so I don’t think that’s it. Maybe I’m using you….and to some extent, I probably am. I feel bad when I think about “using” you. Why? Isn’t all our interaction with others about doing what feels good to us and getting what we want….helping us to create our own expansion? I have beliefs that “using” others is bad….and I can shift that.

Everything in your experience is a cooperative component for what you desire, and the same is true for me. If you’re using me, it’s because you’re helping me draw closer to that which I desire — either by helping me experience my desires directly or helping me experience something that will clarify and amplify my desires.

I sat down to write out a nice, long list of all the things you’ve said that cause me to feel bad and yet, I am feeling complete and no longer have a need to share them because it is becoming more and more clear to me that this is more about me and my thoughts, than about you.

The things that I say cannot cause you to feel good or bad. It’s your response to the things that I say that causes you to feel that way.

[5/29/2011 11:17:35 AM] Susanne:

Similarly, if you’re no where near the vibration of love, love seems absurd. “Why would I love you if you don’t love me?” “Why would I love you if I might get hurt?”

You know and understand so much.

While you’re experiencing or remembering love that you can see, you feel great; but in the absence of love that you can see, you experience an absence of love. And from that absence of love you perceive an absence of love even in the love that you previously experienced.

Again, you’re dead on. You can read me like a book.

[5/29/2011 11:22:02 AM] Josh Billings:

I don’t want to just try and think happier thoughts (i.e.- living in the land of make-believe), I want to actually BELIEVE them….because when I actually believe them, I don’t have to keep traveling to the land of make-believe. That trip is starting to feel like a lot of work.

Do you know why it’s starting to feel like a lot of work? Because you’re calling it the land of make-believe and activating resistance that conflicts with you’re desire to experience things that are real, and that matter, and that make a difference.

Whatever you can conceive you can achieve, but rather than focusing on your ability to create what you desire you’re focusing more and more on your inability to create it. And once you resign yourself to not being able to have what you want, the only way to feel better is to lessen the desire for what you want. Which is exactly what you’re doing it by dismissively referring to your vision for what you want to experience as the land of make-believe.

Even though I have gotten a lot of clarity from this little exercise, it doesn’t feel like I’m completely there yet….but I’m on my way.

You’re never completely there. Expansion is infinite. You are a creator. You will never feel complete because there will always be inspiration to create more. But you can feel fulfilled and satisfied by appreciating what you have created and your ability to create anew.

Because I want to believe that I’m beautiful.

Why do you want to believe you’re beautiful? Beautiful is just a concept, a word. Out of all the words in the english language, why do you want to equate yourself to this one?

This feels off to me. The part “This stunts your ability to focus on something for long enough to actually bring it into reality” really doesn’t resonate with me. I think my perspective on the subject is at fault here.

What I should say is that by calling your desired reality a fantasy world you turn focusing on your desired reality into focusing on the lack of your desired reality.

[5/29/2011 11:39:17 AM] Susanne:

Whatever you can conceive you can achieve, but rather than focusing on your ability to create what you desire you’re focusing more and more on your inability to create it. And once you resign yourself to not being able to have what you want, the only way to feel better is to lessen the desire for what you want. Which is exactly what you’re doing it by dismissively referring to your vision for what you want to experience as the land of make-believe.

Yes, I know (and believe) that whatever I can conceive, I can achieve. However, because I am not feeling like I am manifesting those desires in my relationship with you, I feel like I am not creating the life I want. And yet, if I am in the vortex, I can see that I HAVE manifested exactly what I want in my relationship with you.

I can also see that I may have too specifically defined that I want what I want with YOU and no one else. I may not be allowing myself to see the other forms of love (as you mentioned earlier). I am afraid to let go of you and allow….it feels scary. And yet, I feel like that’s what I’ve been doing the last couple of days…..letting you go….at least emotionally and figuratively. It is a scary ride, but one that I am feeling called to explore. I know in the past when I have “let you go”, it has actually brought us closer and formed an even deeper relationship.

[5/29/2011 11:40:20 AM] Josh Billings:

Now how do I keep from thinking this way when I’ve done it for so long?

Why does how long you’ve done it matter? And if it does matter, then how come you’re focused on such a thin slice of time? The eternity of who you are has only thought that way for an extremely short period of time in the grand scheme of things.

Mmmmm, I feel good when I think of never doubting your love for me again. I want to be able to see love in all its forms, not just the ones that I have defined.

[5/29/2011 11:41:28 AM] Susanne:

What I should say is that by calling your desired reality a fantasy world you turn focusing on your desired reality into focusing on the lack of your desired reality.

OK, I can definitely feel this.

[5/29/2011 11:43:11 AM] Josh Billings:

I actually believe that the immediate benefits you are receiving are helping you to create the life you truly want. You are not using one in place of getting the other, you are using one to help create the other (it’s inclusive).

When you use Sweet’n Low instead of sugar, is Sweet’n Low helping you create sugar? Or are both simply different paths that both lead to the essence of your desire?

[5/29/2011 11:46:37 AM] Susanne:

Or are both simply different paths that both lead to the essence of your desire?

yes, to this.

[5/29/2011 11:47:36 AM] Josh Billings:

This scares me and the reason is because I think about you not being in my life….and that doesn’t feel good.

Why are you attached to me being in your life? I could look back at some of the stories you’ve shared and infer that you seem pretty attached to your first husband when you two broke up. Is your life worse off now than it would’ve been if you stayed with him?

[5/29/2011 11:47:37 AM] Susanne:

because the immediate benefits seem to outweigh his deeper desires to build the life he truly wants.

But in this original statement, it was feeling like you were choosing one over the other.

[5/29/2011 11:47:59 AM] Josh Billings:

….and I would never doubt MY love for YOU again either…..and I feel really good when I think that way.

What about your love for you?

[5/29/2011 11:48:44 AM] Susanne:

Well, I guess that’s a good point. When I am loving me, it is very easy to love you

[5/29/2011 11:49:17 AM] Josh Billings:

<<< You know and understand so much.

lol

Again, you’re dead on. You can read me like a book.

At the heart of everything lies vibration, and vibration cannot hide.

I can also see that I may have too specifically defined that I want what I want with YOU and no one else. I may not be allowing myself to see the other forms of love (as you mentioned earlier). I am afraid to let go of you and allow….it feels scary. And yet, I feel like that’s what I’ve been doing the last couple of days…..letting you go….at least emotionally and figuratively. It is a scary ride, but one that I am feeling called to explore. I know in the past when I have “let you go”, it has actually brought us closer and formed an even deeper relationship.

Perhaps you’re not letting me go, but letting the conditions you place on your love go.

But in this original statement, it was feeling like you were choosing one over the other.

When you choose Sweet’n Low over sugar you are choosing one over the other. We came here to choose and develop preferences. If we wanted to experience it all we would have stayed in Source and maintained our broader perspective. We came here to experience life more deeply, and in unique, highly concentrated ways.

[5/29/2011 11:58:58 AM] Susanne:

Why are you attached to me being in your life?

Good question. I’m not sure why. I can just feel it….deep down….I just want you in my life. I knew I was done with my [soon-to-be ex-husband] when I kept envisioning my life without him and started really wanting that. I don’t feel that way with you. I can’t envision my life without you right now and still feel good.

Perhaps you’re not letting me go, but letting the conditions you place on your love go.

WOW!!! That feels REALLY good!!!

[5/29/2011 12:00:47 PM] Josh Billings:

Good question. I’m not sure why. I can just feel it….deep down….I just want you in my life. I knew I was done with Dave when I kept envisioning my life without him and started really wanting that. I don’t feel that way with you. I can’t envision my life without you right now and still feel good.

Deep down, it’s not me that you specifically want in your life, it’s the essence of what I represent to you. The essence of the you that you experience when around me.

[5/29/2011 12:04:43 PM] Susanne:

Deep down, it’s not me that you specifically want in your life, it’s the essence of what I represent to you. The essence of the you that you experience when around me.

Well, based on that then, and what I am feeling, there is more that I am wanting to experience about myself by being around you.

Closing Words

Deep conversation need not be limited to the realm of intimate relationships. I’d encourage you to explore this method of communication with anyone you really enjoy talking with. If you’d like someone to experience this sort of communication with firsthand, feel free to add me on Skype and see what sort of conversation strikes up.