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My Healing Journey

In the summer of 2010 I got inspired to meditate consistently for about 45 days, and over that time I began allowing my body to move itself. It began as just my arm rotating in a circle, and felt very similar to the automatic movement I’ve felt in the past. It was as if the motion my arm was making was tuning me deeper into the meditation.

Eventually the movements became a part of my life outside of meditation as well. I would notice the movements most prominently when I was hosting Law of Attraction Meetups. It felt like being around other people who were interested in the non-physical caused me to focus more non-physically as well, and the movement grew to be more advanced with my hands automatically touching different chakra and meridian points on my body and moving the energy. Because it felt so good, I continued allowing it, and was lucky enough to have a group of people I was comfortable with to help draw more of it out of me.

That same summer the movements began being accompanied by sounds. At first they sounded like a cross between a bird call and a Native American war cry. It was very similar to laughter in the sense that it would just come up in response to different thoughts or energy. I could suppress it around people who I felt might not understand, but it always felt better to fully be myself, so I would often find myself drawn to the joys of solitude where I learned to allow the sounds and movements without judgment or control.

At times, even my breathing would feel inspired. I would often find myself panting like a dog or feeling my head tip upward as my lungs would gasp in a deep breath of air. It reminded me of different yogic breathing exercise I’d done in the past (especially the one where you hold out your tongue and start panting like a dog), and that perhaps some of the things that animals do to stay in alignment might actually work for humans too.

One winter, after returning from a vacation to Hawaii, I even found myself barking at the cold. It just felt totally instinctual and appropriate. As if I was saying, “Go away cold, I’m trying to maintain 98.6 degrees here!” Then some months later my primary animal expression became the cat noise of “rrrrreeeooowww!” whenever I would think about something I didn’t like. And eventually I must’ve shifted into a higher place, because that got replaced with high vibration monkey sounds whenever I’d get excited, or a horses whinny as something quietly contented me. These days the sound I make most often is that of a wolf howling at the moon. Perhaps that’s an indicator that I’m ready to find my pack, or just a jubilant way of announcing to the world how happy I am to be here.

The first time I noticed what a pivotal role my inspired sounds and movements played in my life was when I was on the 2012 Abraham Alaskan Cruise. I rarely have super strong desires that make me want to drop everything I’m doing to manifest something, but getting up on stage and speaking with Abraham one-on-one from the “Hot Seat” was one of those desires. In fact, I was focused on manifesting it that I kept trying to think of questions that might get me into the Hot Seat instead of tuning in and allowing a question to be inspired within me.

Then on the third day of seminars, during the break, I went back to my room and ate breakfast. I must’ve let go of something, because for the first time since the seminars had started I made my inspired sounds. It reminded me of a time when I was sick and I laughed for the first time in three days and recognized that there must be a correlation there. That perhaps I was sick because laughter was the best medicine and the thoughts I was thinking weren’t giving me that medicine. Well, I wasn’t sick on the cruise, but being so focused on physically manifesting myself in the Hot Seat was enough to block me from seeing the non-physical guidance that was trying to help me connect with my desire. Sure enough, right after I made those sounds and felt my connection again, Abraham called someone else up to the stage who asked a question that reminded me of a part of myself that all my previous questions had ignored. I was focused on intellectual things, when the part of me that really wanted to be shared was this funny, edgy side of me that people could relate to with more than just their minds.

As soon as that person was finished I raised my hand and it felt like the entire rest of the room went dim as Abraham pointed directly at me. I ran up to the stage, sat in the Hot Seat and stared into depths of Abraham’s eyes. Then I just allowed myself to flow and have fun, and even though I only spent about five minutes in the Hot Seat it was enough to transform me into a mini celebrity for the rest of the cruise as countless people came up to me thank me for what I shared, or crack jokes with me about how fun my analogy was. Someone was nice enough to upload the audio of my discussion with Abraham to YouTube, check it out in the video below.

My First Conversation with Abraham

However, the biggest breakthrough I’ve experienced from my inspired sounds and movements came just this past December when I was doing a life coaching session with a client. I was getting centered and allowing my movement like usual at the beginning of the session, but she seemed unusually interested in what I was doing. So I explained it further and somehow organically started allowing the movements and sounds that usually help me tune my own vibration, to focus on her energy field instead. As I was moving the energy within her body, I was inspired to start chanting. I didn’t know what I was chanting, it just felt as if each tone was revealing itself to me a split second before I was making it; and it sounded so soothing and familiar to her that it felt like being reminded of something she had known her whole life.

I did about 10 more sessions with her, each evolving into something deeper than the last. Even though she was in chronic pain and on heavy pain killers most of the time, our sessions together would cause her to feel nearly pain-free almost instantly. I think it was because while I was doing the work, I wasn’t focusing on the problems from the past she was talking about, I was focused on how powerful her desires must be. How the only way she could be in so much pain would be if she had launched such powerful desires into orbit that being away from them would feel downright excruciating. And because she was focused on what I was doing, rather than her own thoughts, it took her mind off her regular thought patterns and gave her hope that she could get back to living a life that represented her dreams.

Since that very first session, chanting and make high vibration tones became a regular part of my day. It was like I’d opened up something new within me and there was no going back.

As I began finding other clients, I realized that while this energy work is great at soothing people in pain, its greatest potential is realized when working other healers, and people already accustom to living life at a high vibration. The first time I did work with an Energy Healer / Intuitive, she had an absolutely mind-blowing experience. Even though we were doing the session remotely, I was so clearly seeing the divine in her that my body literally bowed down in worship. It was like I was fully allowing myself to see and live through the eyes of Source. And it had big impacts on her life too, since she messaged me about week later saying that two of her clients had decided to pay her almost triple her regular rate, all on their own! It truly brought credence to the idea that when we feel more worthy, what we receive reflects that worthiness. And when I’m doing this work I so clearly see the worthiness in others, and feel my worthiness in myself.

Over the past few weeks my work has evolved yet again, and I’ve been doing phone sessions with clients where they’ll ask questions or share an intention, and then I’ll tune in and have a vibrational response through tones and chanting. And then I’ll be able to further interpret those vibrations through inspired words, and have all sorts of new analogies and ways of understanding things come through me. It feels like I’m allowing something similar to what happens when Abraham flows through Esther, and it’s really awesome to learn to trust it more and more and see what comes forth because of it.

All I know is that I’m on journey, and I’ve always been on a journey — and that I get lit up and excited when I connect with other people who are on this path and willing to live life beyond the limitations that we were brought up to believe.

I don’t know where this journey will take us next, I just know it’ll be a joyful one. So I look forward to getting to know you better, as we consciously co-create the next leg of our journey together.

Ready and eager for more,

Josh Billings