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Extreme Support Challenge: Day 24: Releasing Perfectionism and Embracing Surrender

Perfectionism is a self destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect, and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment, and blame.

Brené Brown

If I surrender to shame I would judge myself harshly for that which I’m ashamed of.

If I surrender to judgment I would blame myself for everything I didn’t do differently.

If I surrender to blame, I would feel ashamed about who I am.

So I surrender to acceptance.

I accept that shame prevents authentic self-expression, but I ultimately get to choose between the two.

I accept that judgment is a cue to review my values — If I’m in alignment with my values, I can confidently stand for what I believe in. If something doesn’t sit right, I can explore whether I’m failing my values or my values are failing me.

I accept that blame is a form of discharging energy — The better I get at grounding it, the more it energizes me; thus breaking the blame cycle by not passing it on or taking it personally.

I accept that surrender allows for enemies to become friends, obstacles to become advantages, and short-term setbacks to become long-term shortcuts.

I want to embrace life as a friend, challenges as an advantage, and setbacks as an opportunity to lighten my load.

When I die, I’m not taking any of this with me. So why fret over controlling it all? Why not surrender to the gift each moment has to offer and let life make the most of me, instead of striving to make the most out of life?

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